😂 The Legendary ISP Support: Masters of Router-Blaming Arts 😂

Let me share the magical journey of contacting my ISP’s support team

a group of highly trained professionals who seem to believe every problem in the universe is caused by one thing:

👉 Is Actually Your Router.

Sometimes you can face Internet drop suddenly? 

->They will say Router problem.

If you say Upload speed dies?

->Replied back Router problem.

Server cache overloaded?

->Obviously router problem.

Meteor hits the Earth?
->Definitely your router, sir. Please restart.

I honestly admire their talent.
No matter what complex issue I describe, latency spikes, periodic disconnections, PPPoE session resets, cache refresh patterns 
They answer with the confidence of someone who has never seen a networking book in their life.

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🔥 The ISP Support Script (Leaked!)

Support Agent:
“Sir, off kore 5 minute rakun. Shob thik hoye jabe.”
Translation:
“We have no idea what you’re talking about, so we will provide our holy solution.”

Me:
“But the connection is dropping every 2 hours at the exact same second—this is a server cache refresh.”
Support:
“Router off korun.”

Me:
“My traceroute shows backend congestion.”
Support:
“Router off korun.”

Me:
“I sent logs, timestamps, signal graphs; this is clearly server-side.”
Support:
“Router off korun.”

At this point, I’m convinced their office whiteboard has only one line written on it:
“If confused -> blame router.”

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🤡 Their Technical Understanding: A Documentary

They genuinely believe:

• Router = responsible for PPPoE session resets

• Router = responsible for ISP server cache failures

• Router = responsible for backbone congestion

• Router = responsible for global warming

• Router = responsible for Bangladesh losing a cricket match

Meanwhile, the real issue sits proudly on their server like:

“Look at them arguing with customers while I’m catching fire.”

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 My Favourite Part: The Denial

Even when:

✔ My router uptime is solid
✔ WiFi signal is stable
✔ Logs show server-side disconnections
✔ Multiple users face the same outage
✔ Speed tests show backend instability

Still, the support team responds with the same legendary line…
“Sir, apnar router burro hoye geche.”

BullSh***t replied (“Your router became old.”)

Yes, because obviously, my router is like an 80-year-old grandfather fainting every 2 hours.

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💀 When You Give Them Real Evidence

I showed them:

• Packet loss logs

• Latency heatmaps

• Upload drop charts

• Timestamped outage patterns

• Proof of cache cycling intervals

Their reaction was priceless:
“Hmm… ekbar router off den to.”

At this point,  I realised that their server could explode, burn, melt, disappear, and they would still tell me to restart my router.

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🎯 Final Thought: The Support Team Might Be the Real Problem

The internet itself is not as unstable as their excuses.

If the ISP truly wants to improve:

• Hire support agents who know the difference between a router and a server

• Teach them basic networking (just basics, I’m not asking for CCNA)

• Accept that backend issues exist

• And PLEASE stop treating the router like it’s responsible for every natural disaster

Because let’s be honest...............
The router works fine.
The excuses don’t.